Welcome to Also, Bagels

	To get started, please read the following character and author descriptions. If doing so does not place you in a state of controlled insanity (as I suspect you will) then, ONLY then, you may continue on to the comic pages.
	Bagels McCoullagh Main protagonist and most level headed amongst his friends, (though he has his cracks as well as fractions of quirks) Bagels is the kind of intellectual bully that you can sympathize with. Bagels hosts a monthly mock news program, and runs a psychiatry booth in portions of his spare time. The rest of it is spent attempting to withstand the great amount of annoyance heaped upon him by Pud. No one knows why it is that Bagels allows Pud to put him through such a trial of social endurance, but his seeming indifference to Bagels' stinging retorts gives them something akin to a symbiotic relationship. The only small amount of solace (that is by no means near a quantum in size) comes from his slightly more normal friends, found southward on this page. If you were to meet Bagels, and were as unintelligent as he hopes that you aren't, then the dreaded conversation that he wishes wouldn't happen would probably go like this: "Bagels? Wow, that's a wierd name. How'd you get it?" "My parents named me." "So... are you like a fox or cat or something?" "No."
Pud Pud is a young and naive blob, younger than Bagels and could be classified as a "social barnacle". Their relationship is one of obligation to friendship on one end and undying admiration on the other. Despite his obnoxiousness, Pud's good qualities outweigh the bad. Or at least, balance them out a little bit. I mean come on, who could resist that Winnie-the-Pooh-about-to-vomit-face? Studies have shown that Pud is CAPABLE of rational thought. Just stop pressuring him into using that potential and he might just accidentally rationalize while vocalizing.
	Blubford Blubford's existence is somthing of an anomaly- He works as a security guard on the graveyard shift, but still appears during the day. Awake. Thus the assumption is that Blubford does not sleep, yet still functions properly. He still looks pretty tired though. No matter what the source of his fuel might be Blubford always remains... consistent - which is a good thing.
Phni Professor Phni is an applied scientist of an ambiguous classification. If his field was "owning the house that Bagels, Pud, and Blubford rent rooms from", it's one that he excels at. It's more likely that Phni gets government funding (and rent money) and throws it at whatever ridiculous invention that's on his mind. Phni created BU10NE, a robotic lab assistant, but the level of actual assistance he brings to the table is a questionably lacking amount.
	BU10NE One could mistakenly identify BU10NE's (pronounced butane) primary function not as lab assistant, but rather as a calculator of precise wit and sarcasm. The inorganic, glowing, and uninterested eyes that he posesses coupled with a monotonous droning of said sarcasm gives one a desire to be on BU10NE's good side. But don't worry, you probably are... ...N'T. The assistant part of his existence translates mostly into laziness. But that's okay, seeing as how Phni's undying eagerness to explore new frontiers in his work more than make up for it. (Seriously though, Phni's eagerness JUST. WON'T. DIE.)
Loxxe McCoullagh It's true that Loxxe is Bagel's sister, but she is far from dependent on him, being the older of the siblings. It is possible that Loxxe is the star of a similar comic entitled "As well as Loxxe" or "Loxxe Addendum", though hypothetical musings as these would inevitably bring about flaws or inconsistencies within their respective canons. The co-stars of this hypothetical comic would be Loxxe's room mates, who are mentioned but rarely seen. (Think of Maris, but unfortunately lacking the connection to David Hyde Pierce) They seem to be completely incompetent, calling (or texting) upon Loxxe to carry out the simplest of tasks. (This, ironically, answers one of Pud's lamer of jokes: "How many of Loxxe's roommates does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, to ask Loxxe to do it." Yeah, It's funny to him.) This may all be a ruse that allows Loxxe to exit the Phni household in uncomfortable (or boring) situations. Loxxe works as a hotel receptionist. She has a great sense of style, sense of virtue, sense of smell, and sensibility. Of course, it runs in the family.

About the Author

For some reason many people feel the need to know who the author of the work they're viewing is. They believe that it adds to the depth and meaning of the work, as well as a means of finding reason for it's creation. This flawed logic is absolute tripe. It belongs only to those born as critics. (They are BORN that way, aren't they?)

Still, to learn about Brookes Eggleston (read: the person pathetically writing this in third-person in order to appear more intellectual) does not do much good. It might interest you to know inconsequential trivia and nonsense about m- er, him, and seeing as how Facebook, Myspace, and Twitter's popularity derive from these things, it might boost his page hits to do so. It shouldn't startle you to know that Brookes was born in January of 1992, which depending on when you read this means that he is either 17 or 38 years of age. (one of those.) Alsobagels.com is potentially the first successful (the word successful being used here with tongue firmly lodged in cheek) creative endeavor into the arts. Past attempts include a series of short films entitled "The Jives of Friday Night 1, 2, 3, and 7" which never developed a fan base larger than 30 people due to a lack of advertising, lack of quality, and lack of a working DVD burner. Brookes continued to privately write movie scripts about dogs who were spies untill the plot on the page began to physically hurt by standers. The film series, which would have made more domestically than Transformers, The Dark Knight, What's Eating Gilbert Grape, and the sequel to a weekend at Bernie's 2 combined, was unfortunately locked away by the Serbian government. Therefore, in a way to allow the Creative Juice (affectionately known as CJ) to effectively and harmlessly flow from his brain to the page, "young" Eggleston created this website. He is much better at the comedic timing that comes with moving pictures and (direction of) acting, so this foray into static web imagery is somthing of a step down into mediocrity. Brookes is not skilled with a bull whip. Many artists are obligated to draw themselves, partially because the legend exists that someone's level of artistry derives from their ability to self-portraitize. Thusly (a word that kind of ryhmes with Hustley) I have created this impromptu portrait of myself:

Well, this is undoubtedly awkward. You now are under at least one of the following impressions:

A) I look something like a glinched together combination of Pud and Bagels

B) I have a rather embarrassing bald spot betwixt my apparently highlighted hair

C) I have absolutely no sense of style

D) My legs are completely hairless. I should find it in my heart to @ least doctor some sprigs of flax upon my avatar's barren calves

E) My workout regimen is so non-existent that muscular dystrophy has caused my forearms to shrivel up into my elbows

F) Your purchasing of Also, Bagels merchandise will fund shoes that aren't made of sandpaper

G) By drawing myself this way I have confirmed an alarmingly low amount of self-esteem looming within me, finally manifesting itself as a dorky, pudgy rendering.

It might be best to undo such madness and simply add a photo:

This photo was taken in Italy (It's a country) by an amazing photographer.

Note that the "about the author" portion of the page is narcissistically longer than the character's portion yet reveals little to nothing about the author. And so I give you a small amount of time to wipe such useless information from your heads.

And now, I beg of you, PLEASE go on and visit the rest of the site. I hear the comics are pretty good, there's an animated series coming, and there is some merchandise available too. Bagels seems like a really nice guy once you get to know him. I'm not asking you to go out with him, just look at the little guy's comics for goodness sakes. Give the site a chance. I know I won't.

Have fun exploring!